One of the most sickening and disturbing films of all time, The Human Centipede, has its third installment in the franchise…and its awful!
Dutch filmmaker (if that’s what we’re calling him) Tom Six has finally released the final film in the trilogy and not only is it bad, it has to be one of the worst films I have EVER seen. Its so bad, even fans of the first film will be left bitterly disappointed by what can only be described as a ‘train-wreck of a film.
Every single person on this planet was talking about it when the initial film was released way back in 2009 and if I’m being honest, I actually quiet enjoyed it! It was incredibly sickening but hugely entertaining even if it did leave me laughing more than perpetually terrified! However, like most things in life, it was given a sequel and after months of waiting, we were finally treated to a second film…and what a piece of shit (pun intended) that was! Looking at the evidence, to say that I was surprised at how bad this final instalment was going to be would be an insult to myself. It was always going to be bad, I just never imagined it would fail at all parts of film making 101!
Ignoring all technical, acting and general script issues plaguing all 102 minutes, the film somehow follows Dieter Laser reprising his role from the as Dr. Heiter. Yes film fans, you would be right in thinking that his character got shot in the head at the end of the first film, but hey, he is back, and not dead, so apparently we all need to get over that pretty sharpish! This time however, the crazy German doctor is now not a doctor, but a crazy prison warden in the middle of the American desert. Accompanied by the creepy fat guy from the second film, they both conduct a plan to gain respect from the inmates of the prison by making the biggest human centipede – of over 500 people.
Now, I completely understand the films are for the entertainment value and that it’s a cult film, but for goodness sake, how on earth does Tom Six get the money to make these god awful films? You know what – I actually don’t want to know the answer to that question! Knowing the actual person who funded this monstrosity would actually make me more angry than I am now. I’m still just surprised I sat through this pile of crap…
I watch films to be entertained, and I was hoping for a teeny weenie bit of entertainment in this film. I got 0% entertainment value from this film, and you don’t even hear the mutter of the word ‘centipede’ or even see the damn thing until 20 minutes from the end. It’s not even worth watching Dieter Laser as he gives the worst performance from any actor ever, and yes, I’ve seen a lot of Adam Sandler movies. Shouting and sexual abusing women throughout a film is not entertaining. I think we have broken new grounds here at All Things Movies; we have our first film in our two year history to give a film zero stars…complete and utter sh*t!!
0 out of 5 stars.
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